The "Out-of-Place" Father

Often, I want to change. I weigh too much, I get too angry, I do not focus on my relationship with God enough, I spend too much money. Suffice to say, I am not were I want to be. You know, I want to change for me but also for my family. There was a time when I was working out (it is called before marriage), I was paying all my bills (again, before marriage), I was able to handle conflict better, and I was growing in my daily walk with God. I am not hating on myself but I am just saying that, when I need to the most, I seem to take care of myself the least. I know myself though and, eventually, I will make that decision to make a change of some sort. I know for me, when I started working out and was asked by my trainer, "why are you training," my rather blunt response was, I am tired of being fat!! That is what is happening now except I have the added motivation of the fact that I want to be around for my family. I want to be useful to my wife and there for my son an...

I had an argument with my wife the other night. It went as a lot of arguments do, she asked me to do something in a different manner and I took offense and responded and then we got into an argument. It seems to me that, when I was younger and when I was single, I was able to take criticism a lot better. Someone would tell me to do something a different way and I would just say "Okay" and change how I did something. If I was confused as to why I was wrong, I might ask and even argue my point a little but, overall, I was able to accept criticism with grace. But now... The big thing for me is...I do not know why. I know my wife is just asking me to do something in a way that would please her more...and I do want to please my wife. Not to an unhealthy level (although it must be admitted that I have some enabler tendencies that I must fight against and a rescuer outlook to boot) but just that I want my wife to be happy and to think I do a good job. Of course, today I...

Today at work one of my coworkers brought in her son to work. This boy is in the 5th grade and already is talking about how he might be President some day. I asked him what his platform would be and he said "Equality." I asked him what he meant when he said that and he talked about how he was for feminism but not for the third wave (not sure what that is) type of feminism which has become very extreme. He claimed he wanted to run as an Independent candidate and said if he did he would want to run with the Green Party. There was a lot more to our conversation and I can tell you this boy has a good head on his shoulders. It is not that I agree with the Green Party or even most of his positions but it was nice to talk to him and listen to him explain himself, his views, and his politics. I listened to him. I listened to understand. Not because I am going to change my position on politics or even because I am going to change my voting style or record in 26 years when he can run...

I appreciate change and different things. And I am not talking about some lip service way of saying I like change but then only hanging out with people who look, think, and act like me. Those who only say they like diversity when it is really because they are a part of some minority (and I am not just talking race but using the term to also describe groups that are not a part of mainstream thought or action) group. I have a friend on Facebook who is incredibly liberal. There is nothing wrong with that, yet she claims to be open and accepting but she will not allow any room for dissenting thought or opinion on her Facebook groups. I am also a part of a Conservative Christian Facebook group where I have seen, time and again, the group turn on one of the most active and very conservative members just because he/she may disagree or have a different way of looking at things in one, very small, area of opinion. I can handle both of these things just because I do understand largely how the wo...